You could have a point

Huh.

Okay, maybe you have a point.

I didn't see it this way before, but maybe I *am* mean.

Maybe asking you to bathe really IS horrific and terrible and cruel. I don't deny that it's a possibility.

Maybe you're one of those people that, when all the grime and noxious funk has sloughed off of your body into newly-murky bathwaters, there will be very little of you left. So little, in fact, that your shrinkage will result in the drop of 10 pants sizes and you'll be forced to suffer the mortification of life as a size 6x in junior high.

And who knows? Such self cleansing may place you in the odd position of killing off the family of parasites that lives in your hair-- and there is no denying that murder is bad.

There's always the possibility of clogging the drain. That's annoying.

So, sure, I get what you're saying. I can see how bathing puts you and those that live on you in a perilous situation.

But see, from MY point of view, I thought I was being kind. To you, because I'd presumed you *wanted* friends, and you know, to everyone around you. Oh there are people there; you just can't see them through that heavy fog of Axe deodorant. And I figured if you bathed maybe like DAILY (now that you have that tween rat-like musk thing happening), you might enjoy the calm a shower provides, and come to actually prefer smooth skin to having rivulets of dried salt on your body.

But if you're not going to bathe, would you maybe change your chonies, at the very least?

Thanks.